The Best Words for Tapping – Set-up Phrase Part 3

Hope

Hope

Depending on where you learned EFT-tapping, you may or may not have seen this part I’m going to talk about today.

It’s the final part of the set-up that I like to use, and I borrowed this from other practitioners. It goes a bit like this:

… and I’m open to the possibility that things can get better.

So what does it do for you?

Well, so far, we have described our problem in the set-up, we have added a feel-good statement for our subconscious – and now we’re adding a bit of hope. A  happy ending, if you wish.

And I personally believe that opening the door to hope, and allowing happiness is a huge boost for facilitating shifts.

In my experience, it makes EFT work even faster. But you need to find something that works for you – and allow yourself to be flexible with it.

I’ll talk about my favorites in the video.

 

When you choose your happy ending for the set-up, make sure it gives you a good feeling and that there is some resonance – a sense that it is true. This will definitely help to facilitate the shift in emotions or beliefs that you are looking for.

Now, the next time you want to tap, just practice this part along with the rest. You can play with the words, experiment and have fun, even if it’s a difficult topic you want to work on.

(And do get help if it feels overwhelming.)

To help you release any remaining fears and doubts, here are some tapping suggestions.

Tapping phrases

Even though it still is so hard to find the right words for tapping, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I’m now open to the possibility that it could be fun and feel good to play with them.

Even though it’s still do hard to find the right “happy ending” for my tapping, I’m okay the way I am, and I give myself permission to have fun with those words now.

Even though it still feels difficult to find the right words for that EFT stuff, I’m okay the way I am, and I now choose to play with those words and easily find those that fit me and my issues.

Asking you:
Do you find it difficult to tap?
Can you imagine choosing that phrase with joy?
What happened while you were tapping?
And finally – are you using tapping with your writing?
Please share in a comment.

Image Source: F. Moebius

PS: My newsletter contains a full tapping round to go with my blog posts, so it’ll be easier for you to get results. Sign up through the form on the upper right hand corner, and receive an introduction to EFT as a gift, find that specific tapping round plus occasional special offers. If you’re on a mobile and can’t see the sidebar, you can sign up through this link: Newsletter Sign-up.

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The Best Words for Tapping – Set-up Phrase Part 2

I love myself!

I love myself!

The second part of the set-up phrase is the one where we “love on ourselves”. The original phrase that Gary Craig chose when creating EFT is…

… I deeply and completely love and accept myself.

Unfortunately, this is a phrase not everyone is comfortable saying. For many, it doesn’t even feel true.

Which is a problem if you consider the function of this part. It is supposed to bring the subconscious into the game, and to eliminate any resistance to the shift we want to achieve.

Now, if that part of the set-up phrase feels wrong, we actually create resistance, rather than eliminate it.

That’s why I keep using a softer variant in the tapping suggestions I put at the bottom of each of my articles. And that’s why I discuss this part with every client I work with. It’s that important.

In this video, I explain how you can find a phrase that fits you and that will make your tapping more efficient.

 

The topic of loving and accepting yourself is quite often a deep one. We’re skirting around it for now by creating a part for the set-up that feels good for you, and that allows EFT to work smoothly.

However, if you find that deeper emotions and issues are coming up around this topic, please get help. It’s much easier to work through these things with some guidance from an experienced practitioner. (I’ll gladly do that for you.)

And here are some set-up phrases that you can use to tap on your resistance to changing this particular part of the EFT set-up.

Tapping phrases

Even though I hate this phrase “love and accept myself”, and it keeps me from tapping, I’m still okay the way I am, and I now choose to find something that truly works for me at this time.

Even though I find it really hard to talk about loving myself and there is resistance coming up when I have to, I’m still okay the way I am, and I now choose to play around with this phrase until I find something that feels good and that I can agree with.

Even though I never liked EFT because that phrase felt so wrong, I’m still okay the way I am, and I now give myself permission to find a good replacement and try that tapping again.

Asking you:
Do you find it difficult to tap?
Do you struggle with the phrase “I love and accept myself”?
What happened while you were tapping?
And finally – are you using tapping with your writing?
Please share in a comment.

Image Source: F. Moebius

PS: My newsletter contains a full tapping round to go with my blog posts, so it’ll be easier for you to get results. Sign up through the form on the upper right hand corner, and receive an introduction to EFT as a gift, find that specific tapping round plus occasional special offers. If you’re on a mobile and can’t see the sidebar, you can sign up through this link: Newsletter Sign-up.

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The Best Words for Tapping – Set-up Phrase Part 1

Which Words

Which Words?

One of the most frequent questions I’m asked when teaching EFT-tapping is this one:

How do I get the words right?

First of all, don’t worry about the words that much. They are meant to focus the mind on the issue at hand, but they aren’t totally crucial. It’s much more important to tune in to the issue than to find the perfect words.

Second, I don’t find it that hard to come up with words, but then, I’m also an author and I just love language and paying with words… so I’ll do my best to encourage you to approach this in a fun and playful way.

And I’m creating a miniseries to help you find a set-up phrase that actually works for you and let’s EFT work through you.

Today, I’ll start with the first part of the set-up, which goes like this:

Even though I have this problem…

And there it is, right away. This set-up is way, way too general. Of course, it’s just an example.

There are two main guidelines for creating a good, functional, efficient set-up phrase:

1) Be as precise as possible.
2) Bring in your emotion.

I’m tell you how to do that in the video.

 

I hope you’re feeling more confident about building your set-up phrase now, and that you may tap more often. Because it really helps, and because it is an awesome tool for authors.

Tapping phrases:

Even though I struggle with finding the right words for the tapping, and I don’t tap because of this, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I now choose to be more precise and include my feelings.

Even though I’ve worried about finding the right words, and that has kept me from tapping more often, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I now give myself permission to experiment with those words.

Even though I find it hard to come up with the right words for the tapping, and I’ve let that keep me from tapping, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I now choose to use my creative skills to make tapping fun and effective.

Asking you:
Are you tapping often?
Do you struggle with the words?
What happened while you were tapping?
And finally – are you using tapping with your writing?
Please share in a comment.

Image Source: F. Moebius

PS: My newsletter contains a full tapping round to go with my blog posts, so it’ll be easier for you to get results. Sign up through the form on the upper right hand corner, and receive an introduction to EFT as a gift, find that specific tapping round plus occasional special offers. If you’re on a mobile and can’t see the sidebar, you can sign up through this link: Newsletter Sign-up.

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New Beginnnigs – Why EFT for Authors

Something New!

Something New!

Today, I’m starting something new on this blog:

Video.

Since most of you haven’t seen me (well, maybe you did watch the NaNoWriMo videos on Facebook), and since it’s easier to decide to trust someone you see, I want to add video to this blog.

And maybe even interviews with authors – and a little tapping.
(Let me know if you’re interested!)

Now why would any author want to use EFT?

In my experience, EFT is the best tool to shift out of negative mindsets. Yes, I’m biased. And it is fast, fun to use and easy to learn.

And boy, do authors have negative mindsets!

I’ll talk about why you need to get rid of those in the video.

 

In the modern world of publishing, and especially as a self-publishing author, you’re running a business. That requires steady work, regular production of stories, a system for editing, cover creation, publishing and marketing – and making smart decisions.

You can’t afford a negative mindset.

EFT is an awesome tool for authors – and everyone, really.

Here are some suggestions for some tapping – to help you release a negative mindset.

Tapping Phrases

Even though I never thought about changing mindset, it always seems I just feel what I feel, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I’m now open to the possibility that I can change how I feel about my writing and my business.

Even though I often feel bad about my writing, but never thought this could be changed, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I’m now open to using EFT to make my life easier.

Even though I often feel resistance to writing, and I thought this is just part of the job, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I’m now open to the possibility that writing could be much, much easier.

Asking you:
How do you feel about being an author?
About running your own business?
What happened while you were tapping?
And finally – are you writing right now?
Please share in a comment.

Image Source: F. Moebius

PS: My newsletter contains a full tapping round to go with my blog posts, so it’ll be easier for you to get results. Sign up through the form on the upper right hand corner, and receive an introduction to EFT as a gift, find that specific tapping round plus occasional special offers. If you’re on a mobile and can’t see the sidebar, you can sign up through this link: Newsletter Sign-up.

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Procrastination – Final Thoughts

Yay for Systems

Yay for Systems!

I hope that with this series I’ve been able to show you that it’s negative emotions that underly most instances of procrastination. That’s how we try to protect ourselves from bad stuff – which in most cases isn’t even true. So we procrastinate because of emotions.

Worries, fears, and of course, outdated safety programs.

I also hope that I could encourage you to tap on these feelings when you’re procrastinating again on something.

Because all these fears and worries, and especially that nasty bad conscience when you didn’t do something again – all of this doesn’t even have to happen.

All you need to do is to tap on these resistances as they come up. And the tasks you procrastinate on are the perfect triggers to make them visible.

It’s as simple as that.

A round of tapping takes a few minutes, at most. And sometimes, all you need to do is to become aware of what is really going on to make it shift. Continue reading

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Procrastination – Fear of the Success Rat Race

More Success!

More Success!

What comes after a success?

The next success, of course.

Preferably one that tops the first one.

The next bestseller. The next, even bigger award. More five-star reviews, more blogs, more, more, more…

Better, bigger, even more awesome!

And what happens if the next book doesn’t make bestseller?

When there’s no new award to celebrate and market?

That’s even worse, because you already know those moments of joy, those awesome, heady days when you celebrate a huge success.

It makes the hole bigger, the failure more painful.

The higher you fly, the deeper the fall.

We creative people can easily imagine that. Continue reading

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Procrastination – Fear of Success

Scared of Success

Scared of Success

At first glance, this sounds rather weird.

Why would people be afraid of success when all we want is to be successful?

It’s because of our wild imagination. We need it for our creative endeavors, but it can also trip us up when we think of our success.

Because what happens after we enjoy our success?

Life goes on. Inevitably.

Even winners of the Nobel prize continue to make their own breakfast, and probably clean their toilet themselves.

Our success gets old, stale and will be forgotten eventually.

We will have to repeat it.

Which means that the pressure is back on and probably higher than before we had our first success, the one we dreamed about. Continue reading

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Procrastination – Fear of being Judged

Afraid of being judged

Afraid of being judged.

Underneath all those fears that I’ve been talking about in the last few weeks is another, much bigger fear:

The fear of being judged.

The big issue behind that fear is that being judged means being rejected and getting kicked out of your group, which in turn means dying all alone in the saber-tooth tiger infested wilderness.

Yes, this is an old stone-age fear.

And yet, it is very much alive in ourselves, since we humans are a social species and need groups to survive.

Being rejected by your group meant death back then, quite simply. We still don’t like taking that risk – and finishing your book, publishing it and making it visible for practically everyone in the work does mean taking the risk of being judged.

That’s why we may not finish writing our book.

Why we hesitate to publish it and prefer doing yet another rewrite or editing run.

Why hitting that publish button is so difficult.

And that’s why getting bad reviews can feel so frightening.

We want to stay in our group and be safe. Continue reading

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Procrastination – Fear of being Seen

Afraid to be seen

Afraid to be seen

The Fear of being seen is another reason why we procrastinate and don’t finish stories, art projects, or other tasks.

Because once we finish, our product needs to be seen.

That book needs readers, that painting needs viewers, that piece of art has to go to exhibitions and find a buyer. (And of course, that opens up a number of other tasks to procrastinate on!)

And of course, if our products are being seen, we as creators are also on the line.

Being seen means to be visible.

With all of our flaws. With all the parts we don’t even like about ourselves.

It begins with our body.

We may not like how we look.

We may not have that ideal weight. (Dare I mention that idiotic “thigh gap”?)

We may not have ideal hair.

We may not like being looked at.

Some of us can hide a little.

Authors can use a pen name, and so can other artists. Continue reading

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Procrastination – Perfectionism

I must be perfect.

I must be perfect.

Perfectionism is a bit like the big brother of the fear of mistakes – the stakes, however, are much higher.

You can’t allow a single blemish, because then it wouldn’t be perfect anymore.

It takes enormous amounts of time and effort to be perfect, and the temptation to put it all off is much larger.

The cost of failure is also much higher – I’ll get to that in a moment.

Perfectionism is a killer.

That’s because perfectionism is the symptom of a very detrimental mindset.

In her book “Mindset”, Carol Dweck talks about a “fixed mindset”.

This is the belief that you can only be good at something if you have talent.

And talent expresses itself with perfect results right away.

Perfectionism is the expression of this belief.

The downside, however, is horrible. Continue reading

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